you have to do it, but you feel guilty about it.

Harsh language all around below. My comments are in bold.


http://whatthefuckhasobamadonesofar.com/

Appointed more openly gay officials than any other president in US history--Who really gives a fuck what their orientation is? How about appointing competent people, regardless of their orientation, which is no one's fucking business?

The American Recovery & Reinvestment Act of 2009: a $789 billion economic stimulus plan--which our children will have to pay for, if there's an economy left.

Signed the Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Act, restoring basic protections against pay discrimination for women and other workers--so, he signed something Congress passed, which is something that should have been in effect all along, and has been argued before, but THIS TIME it will reeeaaallly happen! Trust us.

Launched recovery.gov to track spending from the Recovery Act, providing transparency and allowing the public to report fraud, waste, or abuse--"Transparency." You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

Provided the Department of Veterans Affairs with more than $1.4 billion to improve services to America's Veterans--they must be enjoying that at their cocktail parties, because I and other local vets sure as hell aren't getting anything from it.

Signed the Children's Health Insurance Reauthorization Act, which provides health care to 11 million kids -- 4 million of whom were previously uninsured--so, now I have to pay for someone else's kids as well as my own? Thanks, cockbag.

Repealed Bush era restrictions on federal funding for embryonic stem cell research--okay, that's fine. Are you going to credit Bush with starting more lines of research than his predecessors? Because he did.

Signed the Christopher and Dana Reeve Paralysis Act, the first piece of comprehensive legislation aimed at improving the lives of Americans living with paralysis--by "help" you mean "More of my money," right? You statists just LOVE my money, don't you? Meaning "CONGRESS," who passed this law, and 0bama, the weasel who endorsed it.

Developed stimulus package, which includes approx. $18 billion for nondefense scientific research and development--no previous president spent money on non-defense R&D. Oh, wait. They did.

Issued executive order to close the prison at Guantanamo Bay--BWUAHAHAHAHAHA when you remove your lips from his organ, you'll find out it's STILL OPEN! And that he's released less prisoners than Bush did:


On January 22, 2009 the White House announced that President Barack Obama had signed an order to suspend the proceedings of the Guantanamo military commission for 120 days and that the detention facility would be shut down within the year.


OOPS.

On May 20, 2009, the United States Senate passed an amendment to the Supplemental Appropriations Act of 2009 (H.R. 2346) by a 90-6 vote to block funds needed for the transfer or release of prisoners held at the Guantánamo Bay detention camp.[11] As of November 2010, 174 detainees remain at Guantanamo.[12]

Wait, wasn't it supposed to be closed before then?

President Barack Obama issued a Presidential Memorandum dated December 15, 2009 ordering the preparation of the Thomson Correctional Center, Thomson, Illinois so as to enable the transfer of Guantanamo prisoners there.[13]

Oh, yeah, bring them to IL. Perfect place for them. From a tropical paradise in the Caribbean, to a police state in the wasteland within America, where any escapees might actually make it into America. Bravo.



Significantly increased funding for the Violence Against Women Act--so, violence against other men is still okay?

Added 4.6 billion USD to the Veterans Administration budget to recruit and retain more mental health professionals--that's a lot of mental health professionals. Seriously. At $100K a year, plus operating costs of about the same, that's...a lot. Even at a million a year, that's....A LOT. Meanwhile, I'd like my LUNGS FIXED, TYVM.


Lifted restrictions granting Cuban Americans unrestricted rights to visit family and send remittances to the island--so, the federal law against business in Cuba only applies to certain groups of Americans now. That sounds unfair and unconstitutional.

Eliminated subsidies to private lender middlemen of student loans and protect student borrowers--so they're now out of work, and a whole new LEGION of inexperienced, lazy federal workers are taking over. What could possibly go wrong?

Increased funding for national parks and forests by 10%--good. The homeless will have more campsites.

Expanded hate crime law in the US to include sexual orientation through the Matthew Shepard and James Byrd Jr. Hate Crimes Prevention Act--because hate crimes are worse than love crimes, and thoughtcrime is worst of all.

Significantly expanded Pell grants, which help low-income students pay for college--rather than make colleges more competitive, so they'd have to LOWER prices, instead of giving them more tax dollars?

Reversed the policy of barring media coverage during the return of fallen soldiers to Dover Air Force Base--because no one should be allowed to grieve in private when liberal cockbags want to have a mutual suckfest and fuck the corpses of heroes for headlines.

Provided stimulus funding to boost private sector spaceflight programs--which come with more regulations attached. That'll help.

Appointed nation's first Chief Technology Officer--well, I'll just go jerk off to that right now. More officials! That's what we need. Oh, baby.

Signed financial reform law establishing a Consumer Financial Protection Bureau to look out for the interests of everyday Americans--which stripped of the bullshit, means another cocksucker to tell us how to run our lives, and presumes we're too stupid to do so ourselves. But wait!

Signed financial reform law requiring lenders to verify applicants' credit history, income, and employment status--Dat's racis! Didn't we stop that a few years ago, over the protests of "Racist" Republicans? Why is it suddenly a good idea?

Increased minority access to capital--isn't that kinda at odds with the above? I mean, banks can't discriminate based on race, gender, religion, whatever, and since most of them manage things by phone or internet these days, how do they know who's asking? So what you're saying is, people who are "minority and worthless deadbeats." The kind of person the above law is designed to avoid wasting money on (deadbeats).


Signed financial reform law prohibiting banks from engaging in proprietary trading (trading the bank's own money to turn a profit, often in conflict with their customers' interests)--he signed a law, passed by Congress, which supersedes a law which, IIRC, was put into place by the Jimmy Fucking Carter administration.

Signed financial reform law allowing shareholders of publicly traded companies to vote on executive pay--shareholders will be "allowed" to vote on company matters? So fucking gracious of you.

Cut prescription drug cost for medicare recipients by 50%--which means everyone who's not a worthless leech will have to pay the difference. Thanks, assfuck.

Provided $12.2 Billion in new funding for Individuals With Disabilities Act--to do what, exactly? Thought so.

Established Credit Card Bill of Rights, preventing credit card companies from imposing arbitrary rate increases on customers--so, no "arbitrary" increases. Just ones they've voted on in board meetings. Glad that's fixed.

Health Care Reform Bill, preventing insurance companies from denying insurance because of a pre-existing condition--funny thing. The VA (A GOVERNMENT health care plan) has told me and a friend that our conditions are "pre-existing" and not their problem. Ponder that.

Signed the Weapons Systems Acquisition Reform Act to stop fraud and wasteful spending in the defense procurement and contracting system--which will be as effective as every previous law that was supposed to do that. How original.

Health Care Reform Bill, allowing children to remain covered by their parents' insurance until the age of 26--so, we're defining people as children to age 26? The repercussions of THAT are going to go over well.

Tax cuts for up to 3.5 million small businesses to help pay for employee health care coverage--"See, how this works is, we reduce the money we take from you, so you can give us more money."

Tax credits for up to 29 million individuals to help pay for health insurance--"See, how this works is, we reduce the money we take from you, so you can give some corporate cockbag more money."

Expansion of Medicaid to all individuals under age 65 with incomes up to 133 percent of the federal poverty level--"See, how this works is, we increase the money we take from everyone else, and take the money."

Require health insurance plans to disclose how much of the premium actually goes to patient care--which was already a law. All you have to do is ASK.

Extended Benefits to same-sex partners of federal employees--okay, I'll give you that one. But, don't you mean CONGRESS did that and he just signed the paper?

Provided travel expenses to families of fallen soldiers to be on hand when the body arrives at Dover AFB--I'll give you that one, too.

Ended Bush administration's CIA program of 'enhanced interrogation methods' by requiring that the Army field manual be used as the guide for terrorism interrogations--A mixed bag. Good, if they actually do it. IF. Bad, for telling the terrorists we actually care.



So, not a lot, really. It's nice that you're happy. You're in the minority, of course, according to every poll out there. The above might be why.



You forgot:

Run up more debt than the previous 5 presidents combined.

Disgraced America in front of the PM and Queen of the UK.

Divided America by insulting everyone who disagreed with him.

Played the race card until it's burned out (okay, that was probably good).

Assuaged liberal guilt on racism. They've voted for a black man. Next time they might consider voting for a smart man.