The following is a list, provided by the White House, of executive actions President Obama plans to take to address gun violence.

1. Issue a Presidential Memorandum to require federal agencies to make relevant data available to the federal background check system. 

 

Meaning "nothing."  This is supposed to already exist.  The mass of the bureaucracy makes it awkward, and adding more bureaucracy is not the answer.

 

2. Address unnecessary legal barriers, particularly relating to the Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act, that may prevent states from making information available to the background check system. 

 

So, abolish HIPAA?  Because that's exactly what it does in this case.

 

3. Improve incentives for states to share information with the background check system. 

 

More nothing.

 

4. Direct the Attorney General to review categories of individuals prohibited from having a gun to make sure dangerous people are not slipping through the cracks. 

 

In other words, tell him to do his job?  And would this include NOT selling guns to Mexican drug lords?

 

5. Propose rulemaking to give law enforcement the ability to run a full background check on an individual before returning a seized gun. 

 

This is already the case.

 

6. Publish a letter from ATF to federally licensed gun dealers providing guidance on how to run background checks for private sellers. 

 

I've never met an FFL who didn't know how to do that.  It's already in the "guidance."  You can even call ATF and they'll talk you through it.

 

7. Launch a national safe and responsible gun ownership campaign. 

 

Ads about gun safety from idiots who don't know a fucking thing about guns.  Great.

 

8. Review safety standards for gun locks and gun safes (Consumer Product Safety Commission). 

 

Because criminals are very concerned about keeping their weapons secure.

 

9. Issue a Presidential Memorandum to require federal law enforcement to trace guns recovered in criminal investigations. 

 

You want to do what the NRA, GOA, CCRKBA and most conservatives have been asking the Feds to do for 30 years?  And people say you can't teach a pig to sing.  Will this actually happen, though?

 

10. Release a DOJ report analyzing information on lost and stolen guns and make it widely available to law enforcement. 

 

This might help, if it's actually a searchable database...and if local LEO actually use it...something the President has no control over.

 

11. Nominate an ATF director. 

 

Oh, right.  You haven't had one for several years. [Popeye voice]  How embarassking! /Popeye voice

 

12. Provide law enforcement, first responders, and school officials with proper training for active shooter situations. 

 

"You:  Curl up in a ball in the corner and kiss your ass goodbye.  You:  set up a command post and have press releases ready about how bad guns are."

 

13. Maximize enforcement efforts to prevent gun violence and prosecute gun crime. 

 

Will this involve a paradigm or actualization and implementation of core competencies?  Because it sounds like corporate board room bullshit.

 

14. Issue a Presidential Memorandum directing the Centers for Disease Control to research the causes and prevention of gun violence. 

 

What about knife violence?  Domestic violence?  Drunken violence?  Maybe the cause is People?  Nah, that's too hard and would require real thinking.

 

15. Direct the Attorney General to issue a report on the availability and most effective use of new gun safety technologies and challenge the private sector to develop innovative technologies. 

 

"Hey, head lawyer:  What do you know about mechanical engineering?  No?  DAMN!"  But let's look at that:  We should spend billions, most of our profits, to develop something that won't work, is easily disabled, that police and military will be exempt from using, and might get me sued if it fails and someone dies, or fails and lets a criminal shoot?  How about, "Go fuck yourself." Does that work for you?

 

16. Clarify that the Affordable Care Act does not prohibit doctors asking their patients about guns in their homes. 

 

So what?  What exactly does asking someone about guns in their homes do?  And as I read the 1st and 5th Amendments, I can tell the doctor to go fuck himself, or say nothing at all.

 

17. Release a letter to health care providers clarifying that no federal law prohibits them from reporting threats of violence to law enforcement authorities. 

 

Wow!  There are doctors who don't know that?

 

18. Provide incentives for schools to hire school resource officers. 

 

So...exactly what the NRA proposed...hidden down around the end.  Sneaky, sneaky. I see what you did there.

 

19. Develop model emergency response plans for schools, houses of worship and institutions of higher education. 

 

Assuming they all have the same floorplan, environment, local demographics and threats, that's brilliant.  Wait, what?

 

20. Release a letter to state health officials clarifying the scope of mental health services that Medicaid plans must cover. 

 

I won't comment on this because it might actually be useful, but I have no idea what he actually said. 

 

21. Finalize regulations clarifying essential health benefits and parity requirements within ACA exchanges. 

 

Ditto

 

22. Commit to finalizing mental health parity regulations. 

 

I'm withholding comment until I'm sure that doesn't mean "Waste more money, create a bunch of buzzwords not in DSM IV and outrage the mental health community."

 

23. Launch a national dialogue led by Secretaries Sebelius and Duncan on mental health.

"Mental health is a good thing.  We should definitely get some for Washington."