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Written by Michael Z Williamson

Created: 15 March 2020

EDIT: Thanks. I'm sending a check for $1600 and change as soon as the paypal funds hit my bank.  Any donations still inbound are going to a friend who's beyond destitute. I'll take that up later.  If you haven't sent money on this, please hold off or give it to someone else in need.

EDIT: The gentleman was overwhelmed.  I'm glad we could turn his horrible weekend around the next weekend. Thanks to all.

~~~

I try to avoid publicizing my own charity, because I feel it cheapens the act to boast of it.  Well, I'm not boasting here. I'm asking for a little assistance.

 

Here's the person and the event:

Last week, my family and I were in Florida for research, including a SpaceX launch (SF writer here. Of course that's research).

Between the site tour and the launch, we had a couple of hours, but not enough to go back to the hotel. We (two families) took all the kids to a McDonald's Playplace to burn off steam.

While we're seated, a man and his son came in. The gentlemen displayed symptoms of frustration, possibly of Tourette's, and struggled with the order kiosk, with some repeat gestures and tics.  His son tried to help him order, and eventually an employee came over. It seems it was frustration in not finding his favorite meal, which had been discontinued.  Note that he was quiet and non-aggressive, just internally frustrated.

They get food, they sit across from us, and a few minutes later, a police officer shows up. Someone had called about "Signs of distress."  The officer was very professional, checked his ID, and the man was entirely lucid and clear during the process.  That done, officer leaves.  Well and good.

Obviously, having your stressful evening aggravated by a police call is even more stressful.  He had a family member show up, I presume his brother, and they took turns going outside to smoke, and spending time with the boy, about 10, who didn't seem at all troubled by his adults, but bothered by the attention they were getting.

For a couple of minutes, the boy was alone while the adults were smoking and taking a bathroom break, and that's when this humorless, middle-aged busybody, the kind who likes intruding in people's lives, comes over with staff to point out the "abandoned boy" and how they should "Call child services."

We made sure the staff were aware the adults were on the premises, and they encouraged her back to her seat and to mind her own damned business. How dare anyone who doesn't fit the middle class stereotype be in her presence!

I should note there was a pile of food on the table with the young man, though he didn't have much of an appetite by this point.

So here's the kicker: Jess had taken Alex out to the car to nurse, and calls to ask if I still have my cash, because some teens outside were bragging about "finding" $200 in the bathroom.

Yup, I have my cash, but guess who'd just been in the bathroom? That's right. The gentleman everyone was obsessing over, who'd just left, picking up his son for a big cuddle on the way out. Adding insult to injury, he dropped the boy's ice cream cone from a physical tremor.

I go to the bathroom and strategically placed on the trash can is his wallet, containing his ID and a bunch of pictures of the boy. And no cash. I guess the punks "found" the $200 in his wallet.

I handed the wallet to the manager as we left. 

So after the fact, I contacted the local police and they helped me get contact info with the man's family. Yes, he was a local handyman, and had just finished some work and been paid cash.

Well, I'm about to send $250 to this guy the universe decided to take a dump on last Friday. If anyone reading this today would like to chip in, I'll send that, too.

 

Details

Written by Michael Z Williamson

Created: 14 March 2020

Oh, don't worry. The virus probably won't kill you. Your stupid behavior, however...

"It's just the flu."  Well, it's a virus.  So it's sort of like the flu, the way people are sort of like penguins because both are animals.  In actuality, at its mildest, it's "just" a common cold.  However, you might want to ask the post-Columbian Americans about unique strains of the common cold. At its worst, it's severe pneumonia. It's also very infectious with few obvious symptoms during the transmission stage. But it is not the flu, anymore than I'm an Adelie.

"ZOMG WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!"  No, we're not. You're an idiot.

"Nothing is going to happen. It's just the flu." See above. You're also an idiot.

"The government now has complete control of the health care industry, colleges, and all public venues!" Not all of them, but they had control of most of them for a long time. We tried to warn you. And if you don't want to live in a nation of laws, why don't you go live in Somalia?

"I didn't want the government to have control of my life. This is why we need socialism!"  Please just kill yourself right now. You are a worthless failure.

"It's no big deal, it only kills old people."  Yeah, screw Grandma. No one likes her anyway. Are you actually listening to yourself?

"The rich elites are drinking brandy and laughing at how they manipulated us."  Right, because destroying a chunk of their own worth with the shutdowns is HILARIOUS. And what rich people do, apparently.  That's how they got rich.

"Does anyone actually KNOW anyone who's sick with this 'virus'?"  Yes.  And let's refresh prehistory for millennials (anything before 1970): the Spanish Flu in 1918 killed 50 million people.  By responding to this EARLY, we prevent that.  You don't wait for zombies to swarm outside your door before planning to react to it. Well, not if you have the brains the zombies crave.

"When it's all over, you'll feel stupid."  Right. Remember Y2K?  One pack of idiots insisted cars would stop running because they didn't know what date it was. Another pack insisted nothing at all would happen, dates didn't matter. In between, a few thousand IT people went through everything that might be affected by a date irregularity and hardened it. It was "nothing" because we planned ahead.  Hopefully, proper prior planning preventing piss poor performance, this will be "nothing." Which doesn't mean it couldn't be as bad as the Spanish Flu.

Oh, yeah-referencing Wuhan is just that: a reference to this particular strain and its Patient 0 point.  It's not "Racist" to say "it came from China." Claiming they INVENTED IT would be racist, but it provably came from there.

No, it doesn't matter what the demographic makeup of the President's advisory council as, AS LONG AS THEY ARE THE BEST PEOPLE FOR THE JOB.

Ironically, we actually have probably the ideal president for this particular issue. Trump the businessman was able to explain to banks, medical firms, megacorps how the short term loss of taking it on the chin for the consumer is longterm goodwill and economic recovery.  Zer0 the Fuckup couldn't have grasped the terms, much less explained them.  Nor could Shrillery the Hildebeest. And as for Bernie, socialists are incapable of grasping economics or they wouldn't be socialists.

"OMG! How are we supposed to plan for this?"  The same way you plan for anything. There's always an Arquillian Battle Cruiser, or a Corillian Death Ray, or an intergalactic plague that is about to wipe out all life on this miserable little planet.  What was the other lesson in that other movie?  DON'T PANIC.

You don't need to make Milk Sandwiches. Why do you buy a dozen of each during EVERY event?  I was on my way to get a loaf of bread that lasts me a month. Well, not this time.  Luckily, we know how to make bread, suckers.

Look, if you buy your TP in bulk and restock as it gets low, you never need to worry about this. Besides, there's lots of copies of the NYT, USA Today, Dianetics, and Fifty Shades books available cheap. You're not going to run out of toilet paper.

Buy a few extra cans of food every week and rotate them through your stocks--just get a whole flat of something once a week. Potatoes. Vegetables. Soup. Tomato sauce. Chicken. Tuna.  Beef stew. Pretty soon, you have a month's worth of food on hand. Not thrilling, but edible. Same with dry goods like noodles, sealed crackers, peanut butter in large jars, etc.

I'm sitting here with 50 odd rolls of TP, several hundred cans of food, 3 deep freezes of animal corpses (from our livestock and the store, including about 50 lbs of bacon and 10 of salmon), shelves atop them loaded with MREs, crates of our own freeze dried meals, and a pantry full of dry goods. The zombies will be eaten by bugs and carrion eaters before we run short.  If you just approach it methodically, it's very attainable even on a tight budget.

Then you can join me as I walk through the store and snicker at the rubes.

In the meantime:

Details

Written by Michael Z Williamson

Created: 12 March 2020

I loaded up the trailer and rolled to the fairgrounds for the Indy 1500 Gun and Knife Show.  My friend Jack, there to help, runs over and warns me not to unload.

It seems they were waiting for word on whether or not the show would go on. They'd been calling the fairgrounds all week, and told things were fine. Then, suddenly, there's debate. After we all arrive, but not after we start setup at least. And I'm local (well, under 50 miles), so there's that.

We hang around waiting, along with the Flower and Patio Show people, and I understand why the governor had pause. Who wants 10,000 Angry Karens calling your office to complain?

Ultimately, he even stayed late to ponder this matter, because the notification of closure came down at 1626.

Show is cancelled.  At least it's early spring, not the Comic Con, the race, or GenCon.

Since I'm not a morally bankrupt, mentally retarded, intellectually corrupt, pathetic pussy, I'm not blaming the President for this.

There's a good chance in a month it will all be a bunch of nothing. If so, it's because action like this mitigated the threat, not because the threat didn't exist.

Meantime, I have lots of stuff to sell online. I have wares if you have coin.

Details

Written by Michael Z Williamson

Created: 24 February 2020

It's hilarious when Demorrhoids and complete shitheads (But I repeat myself) attempt to claim that libertarians (Which I'm not) are somehow magically fascist or Nazi, which they claim are the same thing, while totally not being the same as their own fetishized version of a totalitarian police state.

A like-minded fellow vet and I were kicking around what we'd do if ever elected president (I'm an immigrant, so I'd have to be Benevolent Dictator).

Day 1:  Vacation of federal sentences with full pardons:

Anyone in jail on a drug charge that doesn't involve selling to minors.  Your sentence is vacated. You are pardoned.  Go engage in free market economics. This also applies to bootleggers, distillers, and anyone with a liquor license violation.

Anyone in jail on a non-violent firearm charge.  Your sentence is vacated. You are pardoned.  

Anyone in jail for a crime involving consenting adults (strippers, prostitutes, etc).  Your sentence is vacated. You are pardoned.  

Anyone who accepted a plea deal in lieu of a bunch of intimidating bullshit by the government's official jack-booted death squad and its legal apparatus:  Pardoned for the pled crime. If the Feds, State or Locals want to try again on an actual charge they think they can prove, that's up to them. Though if it's a drug or firearm charge, they may want to save their time and money.  

Tax evaders:  Sentences commuted.  IRS can hire collection agents like every other debt.

Every government agency will be instructed to continue Trump's policy of removing two regulations for every new regulation. In addition, they will be ordered to commence an immediate 10% reduction in personnel via attrition--retirement, dismissal, resignation, etc. If they need to fire additional drones to make it happen, fine. Last hired, first fired. If this means some department heads have to move back into customer service and deal with actual people, good. Oh, that's 10% per year. I want them 2/3 their current size within four years. That puts them at 43% in 8 years. Though I'd consider upping the rate to 20% for a second term. DoD and the Judiciary can petition for exceptions on a case by case basis. We would probably say no.

Only three federal agencies get to be armed:  FBI, ICE, and the Marshals.  Any agency that believes it needs armed force can call the ever-decreasing number of Marshals and request to be on the waiting list.  ICE actually needs armed guards at the border.  The FBI can arm agents who actually deal with actual criminals--terrorists, kidnappers, traffickers.

The Civilian Marksmanship Program would be immediately budgeted and instructed to update from M-1 Garands and sell AR-15s at cost to the American public.  Some of the money saved elsewhere would be used to expand shooting range access in every county. Congress would be instructed to repeal the NFA if they know what's good for them.

~~

I'm sure some "liberal" will be along momentarily to tardsplain how this is actually racist and fascist and I should be hanged from a gas station for dismantling the bureaucracy that makes us free.

Which is why I pretty much stopped bothering listening to anything from the American left.