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Written by Michael Z Williamson

Created: 09 July 2012

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052702303734204577465413553320588.html?mod=googlenews_wsj

The flaw in this article is the assumption that worthless layabouts in the education industrial complex would magically turn into productive private sector workers.

This is not to say that all teachers are layabouts, but you can bet the excess ones are.

The rest will follow suit when they realize doing a good job doesn't matter and singles them out for retribution.

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Written by Michael Z Williamson

Created: 18 June 2012

http://www.vulture.com/2012/03/john-carter-doomed-by-first-trailer.html

So, the lesson here, as they should have known, is never to let the director do the marketing.  No, people in 2012 don't instinctively know who John Carter is, and they've seen special effects before.

Here, then, is one example of an ad that would have doubled attendance and made it successful:

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"Before Avatar"

SNAPSHOT OF HELIUM PALACE WITH BABES IN ARMOR

"Before Star Wars"

BIG, LUSH PANORAMA OF HELIUM

"There was John Carter"

CARTER LEAPS INTO MELEE AND STARTS SLAYING GREEN MARTIANS

"From the creator of Tarzan"

SHOT OF AIRBORNE GUNSHIPS RAKING EACH OTHER WITH FIRE

"And the director of Wall-E"

CARTER SHOUTS, "STAY BEHING ME, THIS COULD BE DANGEROUS" AND WADES IN TO KICK ASS.

DEJAH THORIS CATCHES SWORD, CHARGES IN FRONT OF HIM AND STARTS GUTTING BAD GUYS. "LET ME KNOW WHEN IT GETS DANGEROUS."

"A century old epic, in a universe not quite our own."

MORE LIGHTSHIPS SHOOTING, ARENA SCENE, CLOSEUP OF SEVERAL HELIUM CHICKS IN ARMOR SLAYING ENEMY, AND SEVERAL BUFF, HELIUM MEN IN ARMOR DOING SAME.

"John Carter of Mars."

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There y'go, Andrew Stanton.  I polluted your pure vision of JC, but sold the fucking movie.  You're welcome.

Asshole.

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Written by Michael Z Williamson

Created: 15 June 2012

This is my wife's aunt. She's an interesting artist, a good person, and very supportive. Her art is vivid and colorful, and she'll paint you something original for helping out.

http://www.indiegogo.com/projects/106940?c=activity

Donate $100 and I'll make you a supporting character in a book.

Donate $250 and you can choose the deaths for the supporting characters,. ;) (subject to rules of the book's milieu)

For $50, I'll send you two signed hardcovers. When Diplomacy Fails... and whatever else I have that you like.

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Written by Michael Z Williamson

Created: 09 June 2012

http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2012/jun/09/did-republicans-deliberately-crash-us-economy?fb=optOut

The party not in power for the last 6 years is SO !@#$ING POWERFUL they still control the economy. Let us bow before them, lest they are vengeful gods.

Is this The Nation, Der Spiegel or the National Inquirer?

Oh, it's the Guardian. Almost as credible as the Daily Wail.

I had someone challenge me with:

They said: Not sure which is more flawed: the article's thesis or your claim that the republicans haven't been "in power" for 6 years.

My response:  Dems controlled Congress from Jan 2007. They've had the WH and all Cabinet positions since Jan 2009. Rs have had control of House only since Jan 2011. So, yes, the Dems have controlled the government for 5.5 years.

If you really think having control of only one house for 18 months can be blamed for an ongoing economic fiasco, I want what you're smoking. Also, I worship their greatness, for they are awesome.

In the comments were similar sillinesses:

RAC1 9 June 2012 2:45PM Republicans couldn't give a stuff, they live in a bubble. Their kids go to private schools, they live in gated communities.
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Yes, and we're driven around in limos.  I have my driver deliberately detune the engine to generate as much CO2 as possible.  I shoot at homeless people with easily available handguns.  I FUCK PUPPIES!

Seriously.  Half the population has private schools, lives in gated communities?  I tell you the simple solution to that:  BECOME A REPUBLICAN!  Oh, boo hoo, I lke being poor and helpless.  Someone else has it so much better.  I must do everything I can to avoid soiling myself by being like them!

Dude, if that were true, I'd pay Party dues of $300 a month right now and consider it a deal.  If only it worked that way.

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Patrick McCullough 9 June 2012 2:49PM Response to RogerINtheUSA, 9 June 2012 2:16PM Your kidding right? Would you like to see the photo of Donald Rumsfeld shaking the hand of Saddam Hussein? ... meanwhile weapons being delivered to him (which he later used to kill his own people) by the United States and its allies. Don't even try to rewrite history... your not good at it.

Me:  Wait, all those AK47s, RPKs, RPGs, ZSUs, oh, and Franco-German Roland AA missiles came from the US and "Allies" like Canada, the UK and Japan? Who knew?

Talk about rewriting history.  Also, spelling.

Yes, the minority party is so powerful they control the government even now. And if you really believe this, it would behoove you not to anger them, for they are all powerful.

Zer0 the F@#$up and the Dems are in charge. They get credit for what works, and they must accept blame for what fails. If it was all Bush' fault when he was in charge, it's all Zer0's fault now. Grow up.

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Seriously.  I attack extremist Republicans who claim there's a "gay conspiracy."  How much more idiotic is this crap?  It's unreal.